Ep #55: Setting Uncommon Goals and Taking Uncommon Actions
Episode Summary
Jenna invites you to craft goals and take actions with uncommon thinking in mind.
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Show Notes
This week, we revisit two of my previous episodes back-to-back. I share ways of pursuing uncommon goals alongside tips for taking aligned actions. Together, these two podcasts feel like a secret recipe for success.
In both episodes, we look at our needs as individuals and entrepreneurs to set goals and take actions with efficiency and grace. We tap into unconventional thinking as we check in with our methods and unpack unnecessary beliefs.
Discover how to develop goals and take actions that celebrate, challenge, and grow you alongside your unique entrepreneurial journey.
What You’ll Learn From This Episode:
What makes a goal common and uncommon.
How to develop your goals.
Why your goals are not tied to the past.
Two types of actions.
Methods of viewing growth.
Questions to ask yourself to align your actions.
Listen to the Full Episode:
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Full Episode Transcript:
Hello, my friends. Welcome back to The Uncommon Way. I am speaking to you from sunny Spain. I have so much to tell you, and I've been getting so much inspiration. But in the meantime, I'm just going to say, definitely come follow me on social media because I'll be putting out a lot of behind the scenes here in Spain. I'm rebranding my website. I have been already halfway through part of a photoshoot, and I have another day coming up.
I'll be sharing little tidbits about where we're staying and what our life is like here. So, it's just a lot of fun stuff; it's eye candy and beautiful scenery and things like that. It'll be a good time. In the meantime, I have something special for you. This podcast has now been airing for a year; big celebration.
I polled everyone on my newsletter list. If you're not on my newsletter list, I put out distinct content there, sharing very quick little tidbits. So, I recommend that you get on there. You can go to my website on the homepage and select any of the opt-ins, any of the little freebies that you want, then you'll be subscribed.
So, I polled everyone on my newsletter list, my clients, and some people on social. I asked everyone what episode was the one that they would want to either hear replayed again, that they considered their favorite, or that they would share with their friends.
It was very evenly divided between two specific episodes. One of them was called Uncommon Goals, and the other was Uncommon Actions. I think those two things fit together so well, and it would be really helpful to hear them back-to-back so that you can see how they build upon each other.
As a special treat we are combining those two episodes. I know that when I listened to it, I got so much more out of it, hearing it again. I really hope that you do, too. Alright, without teasing this anymore let’s get down to it.
You're listening to The Uncommon Way Business and Life Coaching Podcast, the only podcast that helps you unlock your next level in business and life by prioritizing your clarity and your own Uncommon Way. You will learn to maximize your mindset, mission, messaging, and strategy in order to create a true legacy. Here's your host, top-ranked business coach, and reformed over-analyzer turned queen of clarity, Jenna Harrison.
It's November, everyone. It's an exciting time, right? We tend to not be just cruising along this time of year, right? It's not same old, same old. I love any time when we are off autopilot and when we're really paying attention. So, maybe we're reflecting on the year or we're prepping for the next year.
In the Clarity Accelerator, this specific time is pretty magical. It's an eight-week journey, so when you enter now, you're perfectly set up to hit the ground running in January. I love that for my clients. You finally know what to put on your vision board to really take advantage of that new year energy. You have clarity around your people, your offer, the work you're doing. It's always powerful work, but it's extra now.
But let's be real, right? There are some other emotions, besides excitement, that tend to show up this time of year. I don't know about you, but my brain can start to offer up some scarcity thoughts. We have this ritual at the house where we all get together the first day of the month and we turn over the calendar page together.
Each year, I make this calendar for all of the relatives with pictures of Dylan, so every calendar month has a picture of Dylan from the year before. Of course, it's themed to the month and everything. The grandparents love it.
But the favorite part for Dylan is I pretend to be really, really sad. It's not that much of a pretend thing, you know? I pretend to be very sad when the calendar page turns over. I'm saying, “Oh, I'm going to miss seeing that picture, so much. That was such a special time. I remember that,” when we did X thing.
Then he flips the page, and I go, “Oh, I love that picture. You know, I'm going to be so happy to see it for the rest of the month. I loved when we did that.” It really is emblematic of what we're leaving behind and what we're remembering, and being joyous.
But there's something about November/December, and I know there's only two pages left in the calendar. Which reminds me, I really need to start making the next one. Anyway, there's only two pages left. For me, there’s that feeling of ‘where did the year go? Another year. My baby's growing up,’ all the things. So, that's what my brain does.
But how about you? What does November bring up for you? Maybe you're having thoughts come up about goals and what you expected for your business this year? Why don't I have the business that I thought I'd have by this point? Or, if you surpassed your goals, why did I play small with that goal? Why was I playing small, again?
Or, the rush is beginning towards the holiday, so how will I get everything done? I don't have time to make my year-end goals. Or, you know what? Game over. I don't even want to think about the business or my goals. I'll try again next year. I'm just going to give myself some grace and focus on what truly matters, my family.
Having personally worked with well over 100 women to grow their businesses, and being a woman building a business myself, if you're having any of this come up, you are so not alone. This is such a natural product of how we commonly set goals and what we make our goals mean.
Unfortunately, that can sabotage our results, just like so many New Year's resolutions that are unsuccessful. If you're showing up too dejected or frustrated or just totally checking out, that's not your highest energy. It’s not a place you want to hang out for long, otherwise it is going to get in the way of your potential.
Luckily, there are uncommon ways to set goals, feel a lot better, and generate more growth; business and personal growth. I'm very passionate about this topic. I know that this one thing, just getting women to set uncommon goals, can start to unlock everything else.
A goal is an intentional statement about what you've decided to believe is possible for yourself. When you can do that, as the captain of your own ship, tuned into your inner guidance and doing things your way, it's very powerful.
Of course, that is what the Clarity Accelerator is about. It’s helping you get clear on that within yourself, and then own it confidently. You heard my client last week, Ale, being an example of that and how confident she was in her decisions.
So, in this episode, I'm going to tell you how to spot a common goal. I'll tell you what's typically being left out when you set common goals. Then, I'll share some mindset perspectives that support uncommon goal making, and what those goals might look like so that you can either set a really fantastic goal for yourself for the next two months, reinvigorate your existing goal, and/or set yourself up for success in 2023. That is my wish for you in the new year.
Let's just dive right in. Here are some common characteristics of common goals. I'll list them off first: They're made in a very fixed way. They're reactive. We have an unintentional relationship with them. We're highly attached to the results. We don't do thorough planning for actually accomplishing the goal, or managing our minds after the goal. Even if we do evaluate our results afterwards, we don't do it constructively.
I mean, yuck. This is why lots of us don't even set goals. On my intake form or when people book a call with me to talk about coaching, I have several questions for them to answer. I recommend going to TheUncommonWay.com/schedule to look those questions over, because just reflecting on them will give you insights about yourself and your business.
Anyway, I ask; What results do you want to create in the next six months? And then sometimes, on the call, I get curious; what goal setting have you done around those? What steps are you taking? There are people that say, “Well, I haven't, yet. That just kind of came to me when I was filling out the form.”
So, they think that question is kind of their wish list. It's about their wish list, right? Which they can then give to their coach to make happen, rather than a check-in about where they are when it comes to actually manifesting those results. But I digress.
Anyway, let's break down common goals a little bit. They tend to be made in a very fixed way, typically. It's the same way you've done it in the past, or it's based on what someone else is doing. “You know, I've always set revenue goals. My coach is telling me to set revenue goals. This other person is setting revenue goals so I'm going to set a revenue goal.”
They also tend to be reactive, in that it's either a stretch goal or an incremental goal. All based on the meaning that you've created, and the emotions you’ve felt, from past goals or circumstances, right? We let that past then dictate our goals for the future. So, maybe we tend to have 15% growth, and that's our goal, another 15% growth.
Another thing we see is the relationship with that goal. It's unintentional. It tends to follow really fixed patterns, as well. Because how you do one thing is usually how you do everything. So, if you have the ingrained belief that you have to work really hard to get your results, then the goal, the relationship with that goal… The goal represents your taskmaster, it's driving you to work harder. That's the relationship you've set up with this goal.
If you tend to use things as a way to beat yourself up, your goal here is to show you the ways you're failing; that's the role of your goal. If you tend to postpone your success, believing that things take a long time, then your goal will be that far off carrot dangling in the distance. It's that elusive thing, that's too far away.
If you tend to procrastinate and put things off, then the goal is that thing you dismiss or ignore, and you show that it's really not that important. We do that with our dreams too often, unfortunately. “Oh, I want to create this new thing, but I'll do it later. I'll do it after the holidays. Yeah, January, that'll be a really good time to start the project or work with the coach,” whatever.
Look, if this is you, I'm saying this with love, your dreams don't care about the ways you're inconvenienced by them or the drama your brain will try to create around the fact that you're taking action on them. They just know that the reason you haven't materialized them yet, is because you're dismissing them, you're de-prioritizing them.
What if you really believed your dreams were worth it and they were imminent, what would you be doing? What I notice here, a lot, is black-and-white thinking. Where either it's the dream or some other part of my life. “I can either build my business or enjoy the holidays. I can either build my business or have some self-care.”
What if going after your dreams is self-care, the greatest self-care, and it doesn't preclude other forms of self-care to think of it in that way. Learning to build a business that exists within your life. And I mean your real life, not the life when there's this convenient lull after the holidays, or you've whipped yourself into self-loathing during the holidays and now you have this fire under your butt. But all of your life; your integral, whole life.
That, then, is a real sustainable business. Right? Definitely listen to the episode on “Business Minimalism” for a refresher on working smarter, not harder. Your dream wants you to be like, ‘You matter. You belong here. Welcome into my life. I'm willing to manage my mind around the self-created overwhelm in order to welcome you into my life.’ Okay, off my soapbox.
People are typically highly attached to the outcome of common goals. They make a result mean everything about them; about their worth as a person, about their prospects for the future. There's lots of pressure on these goals, so you're not going to plan for managing your mind after the goal time frame.
It's almost like we don't even want to think about the goal not coming to be, because then we'll jinx something. Or, it's a sign of weakness or disbelief or something like that. But I’ve found, over and over, that this step is what lets you make peace with whatever happens, right?
It creates more neutrality, and then, you put all that brain space into actually accomplishing the goal. That way, by the end of the timeline, it's not like you're tired of thinking about it and so you don't want to evaluate it. You do; you want to learn and grow.
So, when people are making common goals, here's what they don't stop to consider. You can use this as a list for yourself, and ask these really powerful questions before your next goal. Which of the unlimited possibilities for a goal do I want to pursue? Maybe it's revenue. Maybe it's a number of clients or consultation calls. Or, it's some form of action goals like, I'm going to have this many webinars. There is an infinity of options.
Ask yourself: What's the “why” behind my goal? What's driving me to make it? Is it scarcity; “I need five clients”? Or, is it growth? Is it something that you want to learn to do? Some way that you want to prepare yourself for the future? What do I need to first clean up in my mind about past results and events? How can I set this goal from a clean place?
People rarely stop to intentionally create the relationship in going forward with that goal. What is my relationship going to be with this goal? What will fuel my results, rather than sabotage them?
A goal isn't the benchmark that you measure your failure against; the goal is here to serve you. It's your partner. It's not the goal’s responsibility to make you feel happy or accomplished, only you can make you feel that way, from within. But a good relationship with a goal means that it can definitely serve you.
How am I going to achieve that goal? Some people don't have any kind of plan. This is something we do, in detail, in Module 10, which is called “Your Success Plan”. We talk all about goals and intentions, and it includes a lot of the material I'm sharing here. But as we all know, setting the goal is just the tip of the iceberg.
How are you going to create success? I'll tell you this, it's far more than just the actions you take. We break it into five essential categories. With common goals, you also tend not to ask; what would need to be true for me to detach from the outcome of the goal?
Here you want to think about; how can I both go all in on these results and detach from the outcome? You can ask; what are all the things in my power that I want to focus on related to this goal? Notice I said, “In my power.” Looking at it from this perspective is how you nurture the power within yourself.
With common goals, you're probably not deciding in advance; how am I going to treat myself after the goal, if I have the desired result and if I don't? Or, what about, you do get the desired result but it doesn't happen the way you were expecting? What will you allow yourself to celebrate? Will you actually allow yourself to celebrate? By the way, you can celebrate regardless of the goal outcome. I know, so different from how we've been brought up, right?
Okay, now let's talk about uncommon goals. Uncommon goals are more tailored to you, independent of others, and in service of your highest potential. First, they're not tied to the past. I know that's how we're taught to think, that the past predicts the future, but that's far from true when it comes to human ingenuity.
Your next goal has nothing to do with the results of your past. But if this is a stretch, then at least tell yourself a creative story about your past that fuels you instead of tearing you down. One way to do that, I'll let you know, is to get creative with time.
I have a client who had a goal of signing five new clients by the end of the year. “But I've had no consults in the last two weeks,” she told me, and there was this very dejected look on her face, as if that really meant something. As if that statement really meant something. But really, it has nothing to do with what can happen over the next months.
But our brains want to establish worrisome patterns, right? If they can decipher the danger ahead of time, you stay alive. Or, in this case, you won't have to deal with disappointment, right? “I'm not going to sign five clients, so I won't get my hopes up.”
When we dug around a bit, it turns out in the last two months she'd brought on three clients. So, she could just as easily choose to tell herself, “If I just keep doing what I'm doing, being how I'm being, there will likely be three more, right? Why wouldn't there be if nothing changes?” So, instead of looking at the timeline of the last two weeks and using that against her, she can choose to look at the timeline of the last two months and how much that serves her.
Or, you could look at the rate of change compared to last year. “Oh my God, at this rate, it's very possible that I'll be booked out by early spring.” Or, “Who knows? It could happen overnight. Things are obviously accelerating.” So, the moral of the story, if you're going to hang out in the past, then at least use the past for you, rather than against you.
Feel the energy difference between, “Ugh, I'm not getting any people booking in for consult calls. I'll never make my year end goals.” And, “This is so exciting. I'm sliding right into being booked out. This momentum, it's just rolling.” So, of course, then that's what we tend to create, either of those two.
This does not have to be bypassing. It's not Pollyanna positivity, it can be intentional. “Oh, I see that negativity bias at work. I also see how the other is equally true, and I'm choosing that one.”
Alright, we've talked about how uncommon goals are not tied to the past. They're also highly individual and self-determined. They're totally up to you. They're here to help you become who you need to become in order to have that result. I know this is a mind bender, but the result of a goal is secondary. Again, they're here to help you become who you need to become in order to have that result.
The learning that happens, the transformation that happens, that's the true reason for the goal, and once the growth has happened, you'll have your results. But you don't know when that will actually happen. You've never done it before; how can you know? You don't know what mindset blocks will come up that need to be worked through or what life events will happen.
I've mentioned this before, but my business grew less quickly than might have been expected, on paper, given other things I'd accomplished in life. But I don't regret it. I had some stuff to unpack that I probably wouldn't have done if my business had just taken off. There are things that I still see people working through that have far larger businesses than me.
I am very grateful for where I am, and when I think back, I realize I might have had an idea for how my business and my life should go, but that's not necessarily the best thing, right? I believe we have a higher intelligence guiding us. So yes, you get to set the goal you want, in the way you want to set it. It really is possible to set sparkly goals all of the time; goals that make you feel excited and lit up. Why not choose that experience?
You can choose however you want to feel, so feel amazing about this thing you're working towards. Do the work you need to do to feel amazing. “Why aren't I feel amazing about this goal? Oh, interesting. Good to know. Okay, well, that's where my work is. How different will it be when I'm no longer carrying that baggage around.” Just imagine! It’s a game changer! This is going to be so good.
Okay, I'll give some examples of these in a second. But after first talking about how the goals are not tied to the past and how they're very individual and self-determined, I just want to go into how they have a very strong, intentional ‘why’. That step of creating that ‘why’ really helps you detach from the outcome.
Because if your goal is just 10 clients, you're failing all the way up through nine clients. But if your goal is 10 clients this year, so that…, among other things, you vastly refine your messaging and your understanding of what helps your people feel safe to buy.
Because your goal is to one day help 1,000 women create this change in their lives, right, and 10 is the stepping stone to get there. Then, every time a new piece of your messaging locks into place, you’re like win, win, another win. Who you're becoming, is a woman who confidently owns her value and expertise, and can articulate it.
So, it's not that you lose the desire or intention for the 10 clients, but the attachment has completely shifted. Of course, you need to figure this out for you. What it is that feels real to you and is exciting enough to help you detach from the result? It's different for everyone, as it should be.
I always say, no two businesses are alike because no two people are alike. But again, the only purpose of a goal is what that goal’s going to do for you. Who will you become in the process of trying to achieve it? Once you become that person who achieves those results, the actual results come.
I'll say that, again; once you become the person who achieves those results, the actual results come. Take away the business of a billionaire, and they'll build back to that level more quickly than you or I will because that's just who they are now.
So, where is your growth? Is it in stretching yourself? Is it in maintaining? Is it something different? Stretch goals are great for helping us think outside of the box, and about accomplishing something that blows our mind, just to see what's possible. “Now that I've doubled, or exceeded doubling, my business revenue in a year, that doesn't seem far-fetched to me anymore. That was great growth for me. I was willing to fail, and willing to have a relationship with myself if I failed, in order for that growth.”
I can remember, in December of last year, I was so deep into my goal and I was paying such attention to my drivers. What was really driving my emotions and my thoughts about all of this? I uncovered lessons that far exceeded the value of that goal, right? I remember saying, “If I'm not meant to achieve this, then it's okay. Because this other thing is worth so much more, I will sacrifice that to have finally understood this about myself.”
I think it was about recognition. There was some recognition I was craving and I needed to give recognition to myself first, or something. It was really deep at the time. I can't remember it now because, hey, the entrepreneurship game is just one lesson after another. So, I can't remember if that was a specific one, but it was very deep.
I do remember I was in tears. I remember exactly where I was. I was across the stream behind my house in another field, and I was throwing the ball for my dog. I remember kind of just having one of those moments where it's like the earth stops and you finally gain that awareness. It finally clicks and you're like, oh, oh, it was so good. It was so good.
So, where was I going with that? Oh, right. Okay, so I was saying I was willing to fail and willing to love myself through that failure, in order for that growth that I knew it would take to get me there. So, once you set a stretch goal, then you stretch yourself, in order to stretch your mind and your belief.
Maybe your growth for this period isn't about revenue or clients. Maybe it's about stretching your visibility. Maybe it's to desensitize yourself to doing Facebook Lives. I had a client once that did 30 straight days of Facebook Lives because it scared her to death, and afterwards, it didn't scare her anymore.
So, your goals do not have to be revenue or client based. Who says revenue or clients should be the main measure of success? We get to choose before we get to choose. I've had clients come to me who were making seven figures, and they didn't really know what they wanted to do. They did not feel successful because of the revenue. They wanted to feel self-actualized. They wanted that personal growth rather than monetary growth. I honor that.
Now, you know me, I do think there can be both, right? But if in this period of your life, you're giving your full attention to one, great. Your growth may be in setting a maintaining type of goal, right?
“I'm going to maintain exactly what I've been doing because my growth is to believe this is just how I do now. This is my new normal. My growth is to work through my judgment about that, about me not striving. How will my nervous system react to me not doing more and more and more? Can I allow myself to really stretch in something outside of business maybe, and not stretch so much in business right now?”
That was, for me personally, another period of personal growth; I did that. Now, as you'll see, as I've been explaining this with maintaining goals, none of this is to help you get out of challenging yourself. Right? I love challenge. I think good stress is great for all of us.
There can still be challenge within the maintaining. There can still be growth within the maintaining. All I'm saying is that sometimes the real challenge is not in setting a bigger goal, especially if that's what you're used to doing. The truly uncommon thing is following the beat of your own drum, rather than striving to reach someone else's benchmarks.
You could even choose to throw out the whole idea of yearly or monthly goals. You can just decide, “My goal is my one next client. It could happen today. As quickly as it can, surprise me Universe. I'm bringing in my next aligned client, and it will feel like we've known each other for ages.”
Some of us create far bigger results. We really blow our minds when we're not setting specific, smart goals. Our nervous systems can relax, and we aren't sabotaging our goals with our brain drama. If this is where you are, do what works for you. Allow yourself to show up amazingly well, and see your results compound, not diminish, because of smaller goals.
There all sorts of combinations of the above. Maybe, “I want to maintain revenue while not feeling stressed.” Or, “I want to grow revenue while working fewer hours per week.” You get to play with all of this. You purposely leaning into your true growth, knowing it will be a challenge, is such a gift to your future.
There are so many people that just stay with what's working, even if they know it's not good for them. Then, over time, their problems just compound or something new happens. They have a much bigger business and they aren't prepared, so they go through a really rocky time. I encourage you to play with all of these different types of goals and really see what works for you. Because this is you testing how you manifest.
Yes, there are some universal principles. Obviously, if you're in a really negative place and you're having to show up in front of people, that's probably not going to work for you. But really, only you can figure out the specifics for you. I love helping people figure that out.
It is so fun when you see somebody really starting to feel out their groove and get their groove. Like you heard Ale last week, right? Just a really lovely level of self-knowledge.
Okay, so we talked about uncommon goals not being tied to the past. We talked about them having a strong, intentional ‘why’. We gave examples of how that ‘why’ will fuel different types of goals. And now, you want to decide the relationship you'll have with that, ahead of time. Right?
This isn't my taskmaster. Maybe, this is my lighthouse. For instance, when I think of my goal, I imagine her shining through in foggy moments, being like, “This is the way. You can reach me.” Then, you decide, holistically, how you're going to accomplish the goal.
I said before, we zero in on five things in the Clarity Accelerator. For instance, you know your brain pretty well. You know what it might start saying to you part way through when it's feeling doubtful. Or, in what ways it might try to distract you from actually creating that success and inviting in all that dangerous change. So, what are you going to do when those things happen? What's your plan?
That is a plan on how you're going to accomplish the goal. It's a plan to avoid self-sabotage. That's just as important as, “I'm going to do 10 webinars.” Far more important, I'd argue. You also decide in advance how you're going to treat yourself with different outcomes.
Your brain likely will forget when the time comes what you decided, by the way. “Oh, I just forgot to celebrate and reward myself. Oops, I just forgot not to beat myself up.” No, you go back to what you wrote down at the very beginning. You, as the CEO of your brain, as the adult in the room, you need to intentionally set up a positive feedback loop that tells your brain, “See, brain? Going after big goals, or slowing down to focus on true growth goals, this feels good. We like this, let's do even more of it.”
So, to recap: The way we commonly set goals is far from the only way to set goals. Uncommon goal setting is more powerful and far less painful. To get there, you've got to put the past aside. You've got to get clear on your ‘why’; use that to determine your goal. Establish a healthy relationship with your goal. Then, plan in advance for how you'll accomplish it and how you want to treat yourself afterwards, given all different possible outcomes.
That will help you detach from the result itself, fall in love with exactly where you are, and then you'll probably be surprised with what you call in from that place. But even then, you still want to evaluate them. You want to get clear on how that happened so that you can replicate it.
Circling back to what you want to accomplish in the next couple of months. Or, if you're listening to this after November, whatever you want to accomplish next. If you made your current goal from a clean, aligned place, then stick with it. We don't want to reactively change goals, ever. We want to hold beliefs throughout. We want to keep learning until the end, and then evaluate afterwards, so we can 10x our results next time.
Now, if you didn't make a goal, or if you don't like how you’ve made your goal, if this discussion’s opened you up to a different way, then change it. You're your own boss; don't wait another day not walking your uncommon way in your business and life.
As entrepreneurs, we can do a lot of spinning, right? We spin in action, we are spinning wondering why our actions fell flat, or spinning as we scheme about the next actions we need to take. In this episode, I want to help you categorize your actions into two categories.
We've got our traditional or common actions, and then our non-traditional or uncommon actions. I'll show you why relying on common actions is holding you back, and we'll deep dive into this concept of non-traditional actions so that you can see how they'll amplify everything else you're doing. So much so, that you'll never think about actions in the same way again.
So, our first line of thinking is when there's some gap, right? There's some gap between what we have and what we want to create. We start thinking, “Okay, what do I need to do?” In order to create different, you need to do differently or be differently; something has to be different.
But let's break it down a little. What is “do” exactly? What do we mean when we say “do”? Usually, especially for entrepreneurship, we think about actions like, “Okay, I'll add in another webinar. I'll write a post more frequently on social media.” I do encourage my clients to think out of the box ideas when it comes to these kinds of actions, right?
Because who says we have to do what everyone else is doing? So, even with the common traditional actions, there can be uncommon ways of doing them. But there's another type of action that I want to focus on today that isn't usually considered at all, and I'd argue is far more important.
So, the last episode was a podcast on uncommon goals, and one of the things I asked you to do there is to get clear on where your growth is for the next period. In this episode, I want to ask; what if your real growth isn't about stretching into higher revenue through, like I said, increasing your visibility with webinars or whatever? What if your real growth lies somewhere else? What if there is plenty of room for you to bring on more clients just doing exactly what you're already doing?
Sometimes I'll talk to someone and they're like, “Well, I need to do this thing. I need to add something in.” I'll say, “Okay, well, how many people are on your list?” They'll say, “About 300. That isn't working, people aren't buying from my list.”
Okay, so maybe we just need to keep doing what we're doing, and enhance how we're doing it. There are 300 people, and you're looking for one client. But in order to lean into that, you really have to believe that there's plenty of room already, right?
Even just through social media there is plenty of room to call in that one next client. Some of you are blogging, even through that there's room to call in your one next client. Really, “If I just work on that belief, I will show up in a different way, and that will create my result.” We'll go into these a little further on.
But another idea is, what if it's just increasing your capacity to receive and finally dealing with that nagging feeling that this just feels too easy or too good. Right? What if you finally tackled that over the next six months, or whatever the period is? What if it's practicing not thinking this one thought, that one thought that always sends you spiraling into a pattern of unhelpful behaviors which then show up in your output and results?
“What if this is where I'm learning not to default to that thought?” How would that change things for you? Sometimes, when I broach the subject with new clients who aren't used to the work, they say, “So, what, I just sit around and my business results are just magically supposed to happen?” No, friends, this is work.
This is work. This is far harder, in many ways, than busy actions that we take, than keeping a buffer between our conscious brain and what you're really feeling because you're so busy with stuff and thankfully, you don't have time to feel. Since it's harder, few people really do it. If this were more common, the world would be a very different place. We'd be much calmer, kinder, and less self-sabotaging if we were working on ourselves.
So, just stretch your brain with me here. This doesn't have to be what you adopt. But just for the next, I don't know, half hour that we're on this podcast, just start playing with; what if those are actually the best, most productive things I could do for my business?
I can't tell you how many of my clients have finally given themselves some time off. They've taken a vacation or something; maybe you’ve felt this too. Then they just come back supercharged, and that proves that their growth, their true growth, is in giving themselves a chance to rest. Because what would they be capable of if they were always in that state? What kind of thought leadership, what kind of contribution would they be bringing to the world?
When you're at that level you can't help but attract interest. You know, what if you take today off, and then within a day or two, you whip out this really inspired newsletter? You just sit down and just comes right out. Versus spending a week writing and rewriting, forcing yourself to push through, but your brain’s feeling like molasses and you just can't seem to formulate your ideas.
I mean, I don't have any personal experience with that myself. Of course, a friend told me about it; just kidding. This was the story of my life for the first years of my business. But what if the “do” of the ‘what do I do to call in my next client’, what if that action you need to take is, work on myself? There are some people that spend too much time working on themselves, and they aren't taking any action.
That is not who I'm speaking to, right now. I'm speaking to y’all that are always trying to do-do-do, even if it's coming from desperation, and sometimes even if it's not really stretching you. So, let's open up to the idea of uncommon actions or non-traditional actions. They’re actions, just like any traditional action you might be used to. I said, in the “Goals” podcast, the only purpose of a goal is what's that goal going to do for you? Right? When you look back on this period in your life, how can you say, “That's the time when I was learning to X.”
Right now, pick a random year of your life. Let's just take the pandemic, because we can think of that quickly. In hindsight, what were you really learning or accomplishing in your life, or doing then? “That's the time when I was learning to be more truthful in relationships,” Or, “That's the time when I was learning that there was a completely different way of working than I'd ever imagined. That everyone would be fine if we telecommuted.”
“That's the time when I was learning to really be with my fear of the future.” Or, “That's the time when we were changing cities. We decided to make this change. And then, I was really getting to know this new city during that time.” You can do the same thing with this period now in your life. What is it really about? Think that through for a second for yourself, about the pandemic. I'll give you a second.
Okay, now continue that connection with your highest knowing when you ask: What is this next period in my life really about? What am I needing to learn on behalf of my future self that's far more valuable and important than the actual result I'm shooting for?
How will I be able to look back and say, “That's when I was learning to do X, when I was really improving my copywriting. I was doing it then, in order to bring in X number of clients. But I had no idea then, that that skill was really what was going to allow me to bring in millions of dollars of revenue. That's what it was really about in that moment.”
Okay, I'm just going to run quickly through some ideas. This list is not complete, obviously. Stretch your brain to see what you really need. As I'm reading these, just feel in your body for a little hit of acknowledgment, of knowledge, of recognition; like, yeah, I do need to work on that.
One is, I've mentioned before, increasing the capacity to receive; I have a whole podcast on that. So often, the reason that we're not receiving our results is because of all the stories we have around what it will mean if we do actually accomplish that thing. And/or it's just so unfamiliar to us, and it feels so scary.
Maybe this is a time when you really work on your decision making. You really learn to just make a decision, and then feel it in your body. Go with your intuition; trust it, move forward, learn from it, evaluate. You're just practicing making a lot of decisions and firing up that muscle; that self-knowing muscle.
Maybe this is a time when you're really clearing old baggage and conditioning. Maybe you're building a new belief, like, “I am the right coach for my clients,” or “I don't need to do anything more.” Maybe you're working on the belief that more time doesn't create my results; I do. I do, through my brain and thinking up ideas. I create results.
Maybe you're growing your self-concept, right? You're starting to see yourself as that business owner or as that coach, rather than whatever it is you used to do. Maybe you're practicing noticing what it is that you really want, and then giving it to yourself first. Right? What is that thing? Is it you want more downtime? You want more recognition? How can you give it to yourself first?
Maybe you're breaking bad habits. As many of you know, I've been breaking the bad habit of overworking. Maybe you're breaking a bad habit of an unhelpful thought, or an unhelpful way of thinking, right? You're catching that and you're redirecting it. Even if you can do this with just one unhelpful thought, it could be the most important thing that you'll do for your business right now.
For me, one thought that seemed completely innocent was, “I'll just do this first. I'll just do this first,” and then, I would get involved with something; time would run away with me; I would let time run. I would then not have accomplished what I wanted to accomplish.
So, just working on catching that one thought, if I had spent three months doing that and that was my primary focus, that would have paid off so much in the long run for my business. In fact, it did, because I got it. That's what I ended up doing.
Recently, with a client, we caught a really unhelpful thought of hers. She didn't even realize that she was disqualifying her audience. Her thought was, “I don't think they want to work with me.” So, she was going in to give a presentation, but she'd already decided these weren't actually the people that were going to buy. So, what did she create? She created these people that didn't buy. No one bought.
We realized that if we could just work on that thought, like really believing that, actually, someone here either wants to buy or knows someone that wants to buy; like, this is working. If she wasn't disqualifying anyone, that that could have a massive impact.
Or, sometimes the underlying thought is, “I don't think they know they need this. I have to show them how much they need this.” Well, why would you sell to those people who don't want it? Who don't want you? This is the work we do in phase two of the Clarity Accelerator; “Know Your People”. You have to get very, very clear on who you're actually speaking to.
When I say ‘your people,’ it's not just the broad or even the specific niche, right? There's so much variation and nuance within that group. Within the niche of, I don't know, physicians that want to be more present for their kids. There's a huge variation of what we in the marketing world call “psychographics.”
What is that psychological makeup that brings you the best clients? Speak to them. Maybe your work is about leaning into the work that you are teaching specifically. So, if you are, I don't know, teaching time management, how can you, yourself, better manage your time?
Maybe it's tuning in and really listening to yourself, your higher self, and seeking internal guidance, right? You tend to just kind of go fast, go furious, and you don't really do those check-ins. What if you started doing those check-ins throughout the day? How would that change things for you?
Maybe it's practicing rest and enjoyment. I had a client, and she was reflecting on this because she knew this was her work. She was saying, “It's hard to believe that that is the challenge.” I think of challenge, the word challenge, is something that doesn't let you enjoy life. But now actually, my challenge is to enjoy life.
It's hard. We say, “I haven't reached X goal, how can I enjoy life yet? I’ll enjoy life when X.” But really learning to do the work of letting yourself rest and enjoy where you are, that’s work. These things, all the things that I just mentioned, tend to be very supported energetically.
First, it behooves humankind that you work on these kinds of things. That you then radiate that out for the benefit of everyone. Also, you're a higher vibe, and so you attract different things into your life. You, in your highest vibe state, it makes sense that the universe would want to connect people with you.
It would know that you'd be able to help other people take that step closer. Because when you start to do these things, you really show up differently. We've talked about this in the past. I mean, just think about it. A person who gets really inspired and shares on Instagram. That's a completely different energy than someone who's thinking, “I need to put out this many content pieces in order to trip the algorithm and get this many clients.”
What's really going on there, is that that form of communication is just what you do; it's just a reflection of who you are. You felt, you are a person who's inspired, from that inspired feeling you decide to share with people, and they receive it from that place. It's so different than, “I need to put out three pieces of content a week, even though I don't really feel like doing it.”
Now, I’m not saying that we always have to feel 100% inspired in order to take action. What I'm saying is that your traditional actions can be a reflection of who you are. Another thing is that your nervous system’s relaxed, right? Your mental state is in a different place, so you have access to all sorts of thoughts and creative solutions that you normally wouldn't. You move into this expectation of ‘how could it not work? It has to. So many people need this. This is so exciting. This is so good, I'm almost tingling.’
Really, your identity is shifting in that process. Who are you? You are a person that leads with your ideas. So, the big punch line of all of this, is what we think of as those common actions, the webinars, whatever, they're actually just the byproduct of the real work; they're the result.
For those of you that are LCS coaches, or you're familiar with the model, try taking the webinar or whatever action, out of your A-line, out of your action line, and put it into the result line. The webinar is the result of what? What do you have to be thinking and feeling, for the natural result of that to be, “Oh, my gosh, this is so good. I must call these people together. Let's just do a live training,” as an example.
I'm not a big webinar person; there are infinite ways to grow a business that don't involve webinars. I'm just using that as an example because it's something we tend to think about. The results that come from the thoughts you put into the webinar, are reflection of who you are and the work you've done on yourself.
It's just occurring to me, about this podcast for instance, I put off having a podcast for years. Really, this podcast was just a reflection of the work I'd done on myself. Of me believing that I did have the time in my schedule for one. That I would just hire this out and get support, and that I could be supported like this. Also, that my ideas were ready to go.
I think I used to have this thought that I might be changing my ideas in the future about what I wanted to talk about. Therefore, I didn't want to have anything out there that I then look back on and think, “Oh, what was I thinking? How was I leading people down the wrong path?” I don't know, this was, now that I'm remembering, this was a big fear of mine. Right?
So, the work I've done on myself, of believing that everything I have right now is meant for someone right now, and that it's okay for me, in the future, to say, “Hey, you know what? I used to think of it this way. Now, I think of it this way.” That that all was perfectly okay; perfectly okay.
This podcast then was a reflection of that. This podcast has never been about, “I need to create more clients. I'm going to do it this way.” It was very much about, “I've got all of this great stuff. We're doing all this great stuff over here, and I need to let other people know. I need to let them know about this other way of doing business.”
So, before we sign off, here is what I suggest you ask yourself: How would I show up if I truly believed that everyone needs to hear this? Would it be, “Hey, we all need to get together for a big webinar?” Or would it be something else? And then, what action? What uncommon action am I going to take in order to grow into that belief?
All right, my friends, that is it for today. Remember, on a certain level, you know who you are, and each day you're just stepping into what you're here to create.
Hey, if you want true clarity about your secret sauce, your people, your best way of doing business, and how you talk about your offer, then I invite you to join us in the Clarity Accelerator. I'll teach you to connect all the dots, the dots that have always been there for you so that you can show up like you were born for exactly this.
Come join us and supercharge every other tool or tactic you'll ever learn, from Facebook ads to manifestation. Just go to TheUncommonWay.com/schedule and set up a time to talk. I can't wait to be your coach.
Thanks for joining us here at The Uncommon Way. If you want more tips and resources for developing clarity in your business and life, including the Clarity First Strategy for growing and scaling your business, visit TheUncommonWay.com. See you next time.
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